ah ha!!!

I have decided to run a marathon in May! I am scared shit less!!!  I am worried about the mental part not the physical aspect of it.. I know running is mental. If you do the training then you will be fine but your mental state can kill you in an instance!  I am not scared anymore. My friend Laura writes a great blog called lalaland http://lauracarew.blogspot.com/.  It is a fantastic blog that talks about fitness, losing weight, parenting and all sorts of other great stuff.  Laura was recently a guest blogger on another site I like to visit and she wrote a great post about treating yourself like an athlete.  I had a light bulb moment.

If an athlete wants to have his best performance, he treats it like a full time job!!! he lives, breathes and focuses on his task. I have decided that I need to think of myself as an athlete because God knows sometimes I doubt myself.  I need to eat the best that I can, train the best that I can and research as often as I can. I love to research it keeps me motivated!! After I realized this I felt liberated!! I felt like I can do this! I am not saying it is going to be easy or pretty but I will do this!!

I went for my first run outside in about 2 weeks  and it was cold but great! It was a hard run, the footing was awful but I made it!! Only 17 more weeks to go!! I have ran that distance many times but I always feel like when your starting your training all over again you need to get to the double digits and your confidence is back.  I didn't focus on the time or pace, I just did my Tempo pace and felt good.  I will work on pace on my shorter runs!!

So only 38 kms to go this week but at the end of it I think a new pair of socks will be in order!!

Thank you Laura for making me see myself as a athlete!!

recap of November

The month of November was all about finding what I want to do on my journey next.  I am writing this out for the first time...I am going to run a marathon in 2012. I know I have told a few people that I would really like to do this but I was struggling with how I can log the miles, do other exercises, have time for family and also every other day to day life.

I have loved the month of November it was great! I have found something that gives me the same feeling that running gives me! You guessed it Yoga! I love it!! I went 16 times in a month!! 12 times to Hot Yoga and 4 times regular Yoga! I am hooked! 

The thing with Yoga is I have found balanced! I have found balance in myself, it makes me feel very in control and clear! I can see that this translates into better workouts at home..Yes Suzie, I have been working out as well!lol! I find that my body is stronger and leaner. 

Back to Balance, with Yoga I have been able to do something I really enjoy and it is not interfering with my family life. I am able to put the kids to bed and then head out the door and enjoy the heat.  It is perfect.

With running a marathon, it is something that I want to do but am concerned about the time commitment and how I can handle all of this..I ran different scenarios in my mind and then came up with the one that works best.  I am going to have to run on a treadmill.. I can't believe I am saying this as I find this so boring and it is definitely not the same as running outside but it is what's going to work best.

Since we live where there are no streetlights I will do my short runs at night outside..but for the longer runs i will be running on the treadmill when the kids are in bed. I need to do this for me and also so that when I am running I am not worrying about guilt of not being with my family etc. Don't get me wrong my hubster is a great Dad and supports me 100% .

Now the thing was I was going to run the marathon in the fall but the one I wanted to do is only a half, so now I think that I will be running it in May!! My training will be starting sooner then later!

Any suggestions on how to pass time quickly on a treadmill please let me know!!


I am going to be able to be part of the club!! Yahoo!!

Moksha Yoga

Months ago I drove by the location for the new Moska Yoga in Stittsville and thought I would really like to try that. I find the whole Yoga thing very intimidating to me so I pushed the thought to the back of my mind.

In the past two months I have been seeing some status updates from some  really cool gals that I have met, and they talking about how wonderful Moska is and what a great time they all have had.  Still I didn't bite.

Last Week I was having a PT workout with my gal Exer Susie and during the workout she told me that she got a job there and that it is a wonderful place to go and I would feel excellent at the end.  I waddled out of my workout and really thought about it. I decided that I would go for it and try it on Sunday.

Sunday came and I was kinda nervous, I felt like I was entering the " Yoga Club"...it was kinda how I felt about the " Runners Club" before I became a runner.  I thought that everyone would be a poster child for lululemon. I thought that everyone would be in tip top shape and all be in the latest wear etc. I got into the change room and hung up my coat and to the left of me was a 65 year old women.  I thought well if she can do this I can too:).


After hanging up my stuff I grab my mat and water bottle and walked into the room.  Wow a huge wave of heat hit me in the face.  I scanned the room and found my little lady ( the 65 year old) and put my mat down and did what everyone else was doing.  I layed down... I breathed and my mind wandered...I tried to get it to stay focused but no it wouldn't.  I layed there and watch the people come in and then the teacher walked in...here we go!!

We started and it was awesome!!  I couldn't believe that I was doing this.  I was really enjoying it.  The sweat was dripping. At one point I couldn't even grasp my hands as they were so prune like.  I know my poses weren't the best. I know that they will get better and I will keep going.

At one point panic set in. I was trying to concentrate on the poses and then forgot about my breathing. I became over heated  and thought I CANNOT DO THIS.  I stopped and started to breathe
and I actually started to cool down, and then continued on with my poses.  WOW

My eagle pose was not very good lol!! I didn't look like I was a strong eagle more like a pigeon. On a  high note I have a great dancer pose!! I guess those dance classes paid off when I was a little girl!

The teacher gave me a few pointers and I think on a whole I did well. I know one thing for sure! I loved it, the heat felt amazing, and I felt light and free!!!

I have to say that I think I had it all wrong about the " Yoga Club".  Anyone is welcome no matter what shape and size. Doesn't matter what you wear or don't wear and it is not about what you can do or cant do as long as you try and move".  Wow same as my Runner's Club!!

So Katie, Laura Susie and Kathy thanks for all the tips and for telling me I would love it!!

I left and looked down at my hands and they looked like a raisin...Remember the California Raisins from the 80s?  That was me!

Namaste.

Hammy the Hamster!!

The lightbulb moment!! ( Please excuse the Oprah line)!!!

I have been reading some really great books on a number of things with regards to weight loss, strength, and honoring yourself!! From this it has open my mind and I have had some huge revelations about myself!!

Taking a few steps back, about three weeks ago I had my cards read and I was told that I am struggling with a challenge with myself.  I was told that I am way to hard on myself and will never reach where I am want to be if I don't accept myself and love myself. WOW!!! Right on the money!! 


I have been struggling with my thryoid and have been doing lots of reading with regards to that and that has seem to be under control and feeling better. Yahoo!!!


Two weeks ago I was watching the BL and Bob said " I hate when people eat and then composate their workout the next day to burn extra calories ".  BINGO!!!


Having a conversation with my friend, I told her what I think my problem is and that I feel like I am on a circle! If I eat extra calories in a day I work out harder the next, or run longer to burn them off!! I am always staying the same!! I am on a wheel!!!

My girlfriend looked at me and said " Okay Hammy get off the wheel"!!!  I am off the wheel and feel wonderful!! It is like something has been let loose!! If I want to eat something that I normally don't have, I am having it and not feeling guilty about it and not thinking that I need to work out longer etc. I am enjoying it and moving on!!  I can't believe something so simple has taken me so long to figure out!!! Blows my mind!!


I really think the hardest part of trying to loose weight is our MINDS!!! They can be kind and honest and then plant the meanest thougths ever!!!  Amazing!!

Last night I was getting my ass kicked by my favorite trainer and I felt amazing!! Susie is a great motivator!!! When I thought I couldn't do something she kept saying " are you sure"?  No I am not sure so I kept going!! I sweated more in that hour then I did running the half!!!  AWESOME!!!


I feel like there is a new spring in my step!! I am on  a mission and am ready!!!  Went to Hip Hop this week and got my funk on!!! It was awesome!!! Meera you rock!!!  Going to try Hot Yoga and some other new things!!! I am determine to live out of the box, and I still can't do those damn chin ups and my husband doesn't understand why I can't do them but I will!!!

So this Hammy is moving away and will not be back!!!

half marathon

I have tried to write this post for the last 2 weeks and the words are just not  coming the way I want them to.. I have deleted this post three times now.

Well I have come up with a new approach. I am writing about what I was feeling the day before my half and also durning the half.  I feel I have learnt alot about myself in those 48 hours.

The day before my second half I was very nervous..My mind was racing. I was worried that I had not trained enough. I didn't train as hard or as often as I did for my first.  The one key difference is that I had added strength training into my workouts 3 times a week.  I had notice my running overall had improved. My mind was telling me what they hell are you doing!!!  I know with my first I was not nervous what so ever!! I was going on adraline!  This time around I knew what to expect so I know fear was getting to me and my mind telling me I was so dumb for doing this!!lol


Race day..it was a later start which I really enjoyed..I was ready to go!  Running the first three km, my Garmin didn't want to cooperate with me so I was focused on that and not the whole running bit!!!
I know, I shouldn't be trying to get that fixed and also trying to focus on my running, but honestly I can't survive without it!!!

The 3km mark and everything was in place!  I was thinking to myself slow and steady you know what you need to do! I started to enjoy the views! It was great to be able to run thru my hometown and pass places that I used to go to when I was little!!!  It brought back alot of memories! 

3km turned into 5km and I started to feel as if I was shedding my skin. Shedding my old self and emerging as my new self!  This is hard to explain but I never thought 2 years ago I would be able to run two halfs in one year!  I started to feel lighter and my pace was better!  My feet were moving and the time was going quickly!  I remember how I felt at the same mark in my half marathon and how much weaker I felt! I was pretty impressed with myself at how strong I felt. I kept pushing!

I really hate km 7-10 for me it is the hardest part of the whole run! I find that it takes me awhile to settle into my grove! I am always looking at the time, and my ipod never sits just right!  These kms were a killer a steady long road with a slow incline!! BRUTAL!!! I got to the end of the road and thought to myself my house is 2km to the right of me do I bail now???

The answer was no and at that moment everything came into play....the music was good, a little rain, and my parents came with my G2!!  Excellent!! I have always said running is about having fun!!  For me this is exactly what happen!!  I had poured my G2 into my water packs and I had this empty bottle which I carried for about 1km, I came upon a police offer and ran up to her and said  " Can I give you my bottle to throw out for me, as I don't want to get arrested"!!  She looked at me and a little stunned and started to laugh " don't worry just keep running"!  It was really funny while I was running!!

Around the 17km my right thigh started to give me alot of troubles!!  I mean to the point of not knowing if I would actually finish due to injury... My motivation what was it? My father in law!!!  He was an avid marathon runner with over 80 in his collection and has won too many to mention!!   I just kept that is my mind and kept going!!!.somehow and someway I started to reach the finish line! I am in shock at how my mind push thru the pain and I finished something that I started!!

I saw the finsih line and went for it!!  As I was nearing the clock I saw my amazing friend Dana who got me into all this mess and I yelled to her! I did in under 2:30!!  I couldn't believe it! I knew on my Garmin I had but somehow still doubted myself!!  I was actually very proud of myself I think for the first time in my life!! Yes can you believe it!! 

I knew I push myself as hard as I could as I was not able to walk for 2 days....ha ha.

You know what the greatest satisfaction of the whole race? When you cross the finsih line and recieve your medal!!  Amazing!!!

Control

Control....what a strong word.  There are so many areas in my life that we have no control over.  I believe that everything happens for a reason and what is meant to be will be.  The one area that I believe we all have control of is how treat our bodies.

I know that it has been awhile since I have written but I have been busy pushing my body...I trained and completed a half marathon.  Have tried new fitness regims and have struggle with the last of the baby weight.  I have read a ton, learnt alot and also have meant some really great people.

I seek advice from all sorts.. Runners, Walkers, Mothers, Friends and who ever else will listen and give advice. I have come to relieze in the last month that with regards to Eating I know what needs to be done and what my body likes and dislikes.

Now back to Control...No matter what is happening in our lives we can control how we treat our bodies..If it is the last 10 pounds you want to lose...you can control what goes in your mouth...

If you want to be in tip top shape then you can be in Control of when we work out...If it is that important to you, we will stop making excuses and just do it.

The biggest thing that I have done this month to be in  Control of how I feel..at the moment not too great as my Thyroid is acting up but am elimanating certain foods and that seems to be helping.  For me my mood is always determined by the scale.  I have given the scale up...I know I am working out and fueling  my body 80% of the time with good stuff.  I am in Control, not the scale.

My husband doesn't understand why I am so obsessed with the scale...I told him it must be a girl thing...I am not sure why I always felt like I needed to be defined by a number..I know how my pants feel and I feel good..I am in Control.

the goal

They say that when you want something you have to visualize it.  With weight you have to see yourself where you want to be...you cant think when I lose 5 pounds this is how I will feel. You have to see yourself already 5 pounds lighter now!!  Think about how you feel!

When I was training for my half marathon, when I hit 15km that was my wall.  This was the hardest Km of my life...I just kept visualizing the finish line and the feeling of what it would feel like to cross it!  Before I knew it the km was done!

With weight think about yourself in those jeans you wanted to buy but never thought you could fit into.. how do you feel, how do they feel..

We need to pick something that is our goal and visualize it everyday.  You can put notes about in around your house, in your car, around work whenever you will see them to keep you motivated.

Be the change you want to be!